I’m watching a brain sugery (with tumor removal) on Discovery Channel. I haven’t seen any of my surgeries. I’m not sure if there are videos and DVDs of them floating around medical schools. A friend of mine was given a DVD of her most recent surgery, and she watched it. I’m sure it’s engrossing.

What prompted this post, though, was how I remember the cartoon of the brain surgeons touching parts of the brain to stimulate responses in other body parts, and how funny that was to me (and continues to be for me.) I know I’ve wondered this before, and here I am wondering it again: what all did they do to me all those times while I was under anesthesia? If they did need some laughs, and getting those laughs comes as part of the functional testing gig, then I find that to be pretty cool. Why not?

I have also wondered if my neurosurgeons operated with musical accompaniment. If yes, then what kind? We were often too busy talking about things not related to medical stuff (or just about me, me, me and my pieces), so that’s why I don’t know these things.

But this guy who shared his operation: he had speech problems after sugery. They could have been more specific: is it that he couldn’t think of the words, or that he could not say them? (Neural vs. motor deficits, or some combo) Or there’s that inability to translate concept to the word, and then express the idea, and it seems so silly and invisible.

You know, like an old friend of mine used to say, “words are turds.” And still, I continue to love those turds. To misplace language, and not know if/when/how it may resurface… It still boggles my mind. How have I maintained anagrammatic skills through all this? Some stuff has certainly caught up with me, despite ongoing efforts to stem and reverse trends. The fluidity is both remarkable and not to be envied.

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