December 2007

Most folks in the U.S. only get the views tracking Santa and his sleigh on the other side of the world via the news and morning shows. I’ve been receiving on-site reports of holiday festivities for almost two days, thanks to an elaborate network and the wonders of communication technology. Rather than just singing, “It’s a Small World,” we get to experience it. Together. Hopefully bringing even more people together in this year to come.

Here’s to healing on all scales.

Well, you know I love snow, but the cold slows down molecules and all that. I’m slow bouncing back.

I guess I beat myself up more than I realized. (Or landed wrong?) Fortunately, the general trajectory has been positive–thanks to mass quantities of love, rest, and nourishment.

It didn’t last long, and early on a Thursday morning is a good time to hit the ER. (If there is such a thing.)

I had an event this morning. It didn’t last long because I had looked at my alarm clock before and after (reluctantly getting out of bed). A few minutes passed at the most, and that included me taking things slow to make it back to my bed afterwards.

After my business, I took time to wash hands. Waves. A series of waves. I’m okay… Wait I feel kind of weird, probably just need to sit down and have a drink of orange juice. I may as well wash my face. Feeling weirder (yet this is familiar enough, a cold or fever, maybe; hope it’s not my brain). Uncertain, just taking in sensory data. Mostly just going moment by moment. (Back of mind has the cycle and what’s been building in positive ways over several months. I’d gotten to where it would be prudent to wander out on a few limbs again. I don’t want a(nother) step back. Not now. I’m not greedy–ive still been savoring every drop of experiences. I’ve been patient and remain so.) I’ll be alright, my balance isn’t feeling off, “I’m just weak because I just woke up and I’m still tired.” Still feeling kinda weird–that empty-head/nose feeling of a head cold; as if nose is stuffed, but there’s no snot or mucous to clear. Ok, stay calm, move gradually… (If I was about to seize or fall, I didn’t want to be moving fast. Too easy to slam into unforgiving surfaces.) “Uhn… The recliner’s pretty far (20 ft), maybe I should just lay down on my bed (7 ft) until this eases. Yeah, good plan.”

After a step or two, I think I crumpled to the ground, with the door jamb as a reference before I hugged the carpet. It didn’t seem like a “fall,” just one of my signature slides.

A short time afterwards, my right arm went numb and tingly for a few minutes, which I noticed while laying in bed. I texted and called family, noticing that verbal and motor stuff was a little whacky (much like right after my surgery in March). I was able to be more calm about communication diffuculties of mine, though, and that made a huge difference. I couldn’t find every word I wanted, but pauses, and not trying to say everything at once, helped tremendously.

The people were really great, too. Kudos!